Pictures of my journey & pre-journey

September 22, 2011

September 29, 2011

September 29, 2011  (242.8 on 9/27/11)

October 4, 2011

October 10, 2011 (243.2 on 10/31/11)

Soon before reaching my limit.



December 26, 2011

December 11, 2011

December 5, 2012

 The limit was reached on January 9, 2012.  That was the very day I started eating low carb for breakfast and lunch, with a regular dinner in an hour (to limit snacking).

January 12, 2012 (3 days after I hit my max at 249.8)

January 31, 2012 (I had no idea!)

 

 April 26th, I decided to start juicing to cleanse my body and reboot my system.  I'm doing a partial juicing fast for now.  I will start a full juicing fast on May 6th.

April 27, 2012 (after losing 25 pounds, weighing 224.4)

 

After 3-1/2 months of low carb during the morning and afternoon)

Wow?! Really? Day 2 of juicing (except for dinner)

February 1, 2011, my waist was 38.5", my hips were 56.5"
After calorie counting, I started losing weight and...
February 26, 2011, my waist was 36.5", my hips were 54.3"
March of 2011, my waist was 36", amd I don't have an entry for hips.
January 9, 2012, my waist was 43.5", my hips were 57.5"
March 5, 2012, my waist was 37.5", my hips were 57"
April 25, 2012, my waist was 36" again!!  Not great in the big picture, but I undid the last year of over eating!  My are now 53"!  Woohoo!!

I'm feeling a lot better than I did in January, when I was at my fluffiest.  I'm no where near satisified, but I'm working on doing things right to reset my body and get to a healthier size and shape.

I'm a little reluctant to hit "Publish", but here goes nothin'!

Day 5

Today started with a juice at 9:30 a.m.
Morning juice:
1 organic apple
1 handful of organic carrots
2 sprigs of organic kale
a small pinch of organic wheatgrass
1/2 an organic orange
1/2 a cup of R-O water to make it go further, since today's juice was liked by my 2-1/2 year old (she's liked them all so far), and I gained my 8-year-old on this one.  5-1/2 year old didn't like it.  This amount was enough for about a 1/2 a cup for Julianne and a sip for Cassie, and a nice sized glass for me. 

Early afternoon juice at 1pm:
1 apple
1/2 orange
handful of carrots
1 sprig of kale
a couple sprigs of curly parsley
2 small strawberries
It was really good! I juiced a rainbow!



My juicer had a party!

So here's my topic of research today:
Taking care of wheat grass.  If you have experience, please let me know.
Does it go in the fridge to keep growing?
Do you split it up and put it in dirt?
How in the world do you get it to juice?  I put it through twice with a folded leaf of kale and didn't notice any juice from it.

Day 3 and 4 of partial Juicing days

Ok, so I totally forgot to hit "Publish" last night on 4/29, so I guess this post will have 4/28 and 4/29. I will start a new post for day 5 (4/30). 

Saturday, 4/28, I had a predicament.  I wasn't quite sure how to handle it, but I handled it.  The girls were doing a lap-a-thon near by.  The hours were from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m.  I figured we would be there an hour or two at the most and I could come home and go on with the rest of my day.  Well, I decided I better get some Odwalla type juice at the store, just in case we were going to be gone a little longer than anticipated.  I had a juice for breakfast and head out.  I was doing very well not participating in the cookies and hot dog feast, though it was quite chilly.  My hands were freezing and my nose was chilly.  Someone brought out chilli.  After about 30 minutes or so, I decided, as I am not on the full fast, and eating a regular meal for dinner anyway, I would be ok doing a small portion to warm me up.  I had it, along with my juice, a brand called "Naked".  I was torn about having the chilli, (along with the couple cookies) but decided that I would be having a regular dinner anyway, so it was ok.  Slippery slope, perhaps.  Dangerous ground, yes.  But, I made the decision, not because I was reacting to stress or emotions.  After we got home, I had a cup of juice and made dinner.  Dinner was leftovers, so choices weren't the best, but that's alright. 

Sunday, 4/29, was my 4th day with juicing for meals earlier in the day.  Juice for breakfast using an apple, a handful of carrots, 1/4 of an english cucumber, and half an orange.  It was good.  Lunchtime came and mike mentioned going to Garcias for lunch, and changed his mind to Piccolino's.  I was in a brief state of panic.  I didn't want to seriously over induldge on one of my favorite dishes.  I didn't say anything, I figured I would just make do with something, as life is going to happen and I will have to figure out options that will work for me.  Mike decided Carl's Jr. was a better choice for hungry kids, with a faster time to get the food.  Phew!  Thank you Lord!  On the way to Carl's I didn't really know what to do.  I needed to go to the store to get some fruits, veggies and a juice for lunch.  That was the plan prior to any restaurant being mentioned anyway.  I thought perhaps I could just go to the store while they ate.  I decided not to do that, but make it work.  I had a salad that had chicken, cheese (Cassie requested, so I gave it to her), tomato, cucumber, onion and croutons.  I gave the croutons to the girls also.  I felt pretty good about my choice.  I didn't use the dressing either.  Around 4 o'clock or so, I made another juice and started preparing the dishes to bring to Bible study.  I made a dish with rice, brocolli, moose meat and brown gravy.  I also made a dish with brocolli, onion, tomato and bacon.  When dinner time arrived at Bible study, I had a lot of veggies, with a smaller than usual portion of lasagna, bread and dessert.  I know I could have done without all of what I ate, but it was less than I usually would have eaten.  I weighed in on Sunday, rather than my normal Saturday.  I weighed 223.4.  I tried on a pair of slacks my mom bought me for my birthday last year, via online.  I seem to recall that I could get into them, but I wouldn't dare wear them out because of the skin like cling down to the knees and the muffin top effect.  I tried them on, they are a little snug, but stretch.  They are a little tighter than I would normally wear, but my other slacks are litteraly about 4 inches too big for me.  I will do a post soon with my previous measurements, from January, as well as from when I start the full juice fast.  Pictures too.  I found a couple, so I will work on that.

I have been feeling quite parched, though I have increased my water intake.  I always carry around a water bottle that holds 25 oz. I'm on my 3rd bottle today.  My goal is to have 4 a day. 

By the way, the juice I had this afternoon was pretty tasty. 
An apple
Handful of carrots
3 sprigs of kale
1/2 orange
It was yummy.  I couldn't even taste that it had green stuff in it.  I don't think I'd ever had kale, but it was good.

Blessings all!
Stephanie

Things are changing this spring!

  As any one of you may know, I have struggled with weight issues as long as I can remember.  I remember being bigger than healthy since 4th grade.  I was terrified of doing the bus evacuations, not because we were jumping out of the back of the bus, but because older boys were the ones that were helping.  I remember being 88 pounds at one point that year.
  To make a long story a little shorter, I've been overweight for too long.  Many women hide their weight, but I don't.  Yes, at my size, it is embarrassing, but you really can't hide what everyone can see.  Sure, you can minimize, but you can't hide it.  Though I try not to let a number define me, it is part of me.  This is me.  I am real.  So here goes.
  I don't want to use having children as an excuse for being big.  I know one thing for sure, I want to use having children as an excuse for getting healthy.  I want to keep up with them, and set a good example for them.  They eat a pretty healthy diet, with some junk or sugar added in.
  When I got pregnant with Cassie, I was around 180 and ended at 230 after 42 weeks.  Oiy!  I used the classic excuse, "I'm eating for two."  Well, by the time I was about 7 or 8 months along, I was asked several times if I was sure it was just one baby in there.  Of course that's what every pregnant woman wants to hear.  (That was sarcasm.)
  I got down to about 200 when I got pregnant with Sarah, and I was "feeling it" a bit more.  My hips were sore sooner and though I didn't have trouble falling asleep, I was stiff getting out of bed.  My feet would ache and my hips and back needed a daily alignment. That pregnancy ended at 41 weeks, 1 day, with me weighing an unwelcomed, yet familiar 230. 
  Going into my pregnancy with Julianne, I was determined to eat better, and not gain as much weight.  Well, I succeeded, even though I felt like a failure.  I gained less than 20 pounds, but I started out heavier.  I was about 232 or so, and ended at 250.  Even though I gained quite a bit less, my body was screaming at me every morning when I maneuvered to get out of bed.  My hips were sore much sooner than with Sarah.  My feet ached worse than before.  It usually took a great deal of effort to get my pants and socks on while my joints were still stiff from sleeping. 
  Fast forward a bit: January 8th of 2011, 236.8 pounds, I was gung hoe to get my rear in gear and lose weight, and I did.  I was counting calories, running and cross-country skiing while the snow lasted.  March 18th, I weighed in at 222.4.  I was proud of myself for doing it the right way with diet and exercise.  (Notice I didn't say "a" diet, but diet.)  For some reason, I get it in my head that I can maintain my progress and I don't need to log my food, to keep my caloric intake in check.  I guess I get overly confident, stop recording my food, and slowly, my portions get out of whack and snacks here and there add up.  Again.  I was eager to exercise outside during the summer, so I stopped running on the treadmill, and I never really got into a routine outside.  Julianne's naptime was often the time I would run and shower, but as we moved into summer, I was getting my garden ready, and then the typical summer maintenance was underway.  I also watched a video called "The Gerson Miracle" and "The Beautiful Truth", which completely derailed my thinking, and my diet.  As a part of my low calorie choices, I would eat greek yogurt with granola for breakfast, or oatmeal and berries for breakfast.  I felt like I was at a complete loss of what to do.  I have found over the years that when I am faced with choices, I have a hard time making a decision.  I have also come to realize, that my indecision, was infact making a decsion.  So I kinda gave up.
  The next weight I have recorded on my "myfitnesspal" account is on September 27th, at 242.8.  Wow!  Really?!  I gained 20 pounds in 6 months.  Lame.  November 26th, I was an even 245.  Maybe I was fluffing up so I would have a bigger loss.  (Ok, not really.)  We decided around that time to head to California to pick up a van, drive to Washington and then drive the Alcan back home after visiting my family along the way, taking about 2 weeks to do it.  When we arrived back home, I was eager for the new year to start.  I wasn't looking for a reason to start, but I needed a reason not to.  New year, new beginnings, new life.  I wasn't sure what I was going to do.  I thought about calorie counting, but I really didn't feel like doing that.  I figured I would try something that worked for me when I was just out of 7th grade, as well as when I was a "young" adult.   That summer, at age 13, I lost 30 pounds, going from 156 to 126.  Yes, I remember it, like it was yesterday. Two guys who had bullied me for years even commented that I looked really good.  The method that brought the weight loss was called the "Carbohydrate Addicts Diet".  It was a lot like the Atkins Diet...from what I hear.  Never did that one, so I'm not sure of the details.  For the one I did, I would have 4 carbohydrates or less for breakfast, and 4 carbohydrates or less for lunch, and then for dinner, I could have anything I wanted, within 1 hour.  As far as losing weight goes, it works.  As far as learning how to be disciplined in your eating habits, it could work, if your dinner was a modest meal, not fulfilling every craving you had during the day. 
  January 9th, I was ounces under 250.  No pregnancy to blame the weight on.  Just me.  I felt sick about myself.  I felt helpless and out of control.  I have raised my kids to eat pretty good meals and snacks, never really telling them no to fruits or veggies, unless they weren't ripe on the vine yet, or for my oldest, limiting her to about 20 grape tomatoes a day.  She can go through a Costco box in 2 days if I let her.  Any how, I would pretty much always have a handful of this snack or that treat whenever I was getting it for them, even if I wasn't hungry. 
In the past I had done a Bible Study called The Lord's Table, from a website www.settingcaptivesfree.com. It was a great study, though I didn't get all the way through it.  I think of what I learned in that, often.  One of the things it talked about, and I have to remind myself of, is that Jesus suffered so much for me, and I'm not willing to sacrifice a little for Him.  It is actually kind of a foreign concept for me to feel hunger.  I would always stock the diaper bag with snacks "for the kids", and I would never let myself feel the slight discomfort of being hungry.
  So anyhow, I started with the low carb breakfast and lunch (with no snacking!) and indulgent dinners.  I boasted quite a few times that I had dessert every night.  Every night.  I made sure I had cookies, ice cream, or some other sweet treat to sink my teeth into after my dinner, and I did.  As of 4/26/12, I was down to 224.4 pounds.  I have come to realize lately, through a book, "Love to Eat, Hate to Eat", that I have not been glorifying God with my food choices.  Yes, I did great for breakfast and lunch, eating low carb meals consisting of eggs, meat, cheese, cottage cheese, dill pickles and cucumbers, with a couple other variances, but I was definitely not proud of my dinnertimes choices.  I started to discover that I didn't like denying myself of fruits and veggies during the day, because the natural sugars in them, put them well over the 4 grams of carbs I was allowing myself for my early meals.  I also didn't like my behavior about feeling such an urgency to inhale my main course of dinner so I had enough time to let it settle so that before my hour was up, I could still splurge. 
  I think I started to feel the convictions of my dinner behaviors after reading about glorifying God with our choices in our daily life, and that includes with our food choices.  I read a scripture that I had read and heard many, many times before, as it is the troop scripture for my daughters' American Heritage Girls Troop. But I had never applied it in the context of food.  I had never even had the thought of applying that scripture to food, and my choices with food.  Philippians 4:8-9 says, "⁸ Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. ⁹ Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you."
  My choices were not lovely and I definitely didn't wany my children admiring them.  I want to be proud of my choices and give glory to my ultimate provider, my gracious king and Lord of my life.  I want Him to BE the Lord of my life, not just a convenient God, there when I needed Him and when I wanted to praise Him.  Forgive me, Lord, for being a fairweather friend.  I always depend on Him, in good and in bad, but I didn't give Him all of me.  Food was my control.  I will be the first to admit that I am selfish when it comes to food.  Whether it would be that I would save the crunchiest piece of chicken for my plate, or the biggest cookie.  I put me first.  After reading part of the book, "Love to Eat, Hate to Eat", I realized my behavior was not selfless, and serving to others, but selfish, and self-serving, even though I don't think I was obvious about it.  Maybe I was. 
  In the last 3-1/2 months, I have run maybe 5 or 6 times and done 1 work out video.  Aside from normal activities, that's all I have done.  I do love to run now, though my mind tries to talk me out of it, with the simplest of reasons not to run.  I believe that being healthy includes regular exercise, and that's another reason that I have to make another change.  I need to be more active.  I need to suck it up, and selflessly make a decision to be selfish.  In the interest of my family and myself, I need to put everything aside and make time to take care of myself, for me, and for them.
  For the last couple weeks, I have felt a pressing feeling to change what I'm doing.  I wasn't sure what, until I read a blog about a husband and wife in Kodiak that are doing a juice fast to reboot their systems, and making healthier choices.  Check out their journey here: http://3inspiringsons.com/category/juicing/.  So after reading their blogs and watching their nightly update videos, I wanted to revisit a movie I thought I'd already seen.  Turns out I hadn't.  Amy and her husband Jake watched the documentary "Fat, Sick & Nearly Dead", that inspired them to take on a juicing fast for 30 days. I had been reading the blog for a couple days and decided I would do a juice cleanse while Mike is in Germany and Finland for 2 weeks.  Yesterday, I watched the movie, about midmorning.  I hadn't seen it, like I though I had, but was glad I decided to watch it.  After watching it, I decided that I would start juicing one or two meals a day, until Mike leaves, then I will do the full day of juicing.  I started with my first juicing yesterday in place of lunch.  I had a light, but filling dinner.  Today, I have had 3 juices and will have a regular dinner.  I need to go to the store and stock up on some more produce, particularly greens.  I was not planning on starting to juice, so I am working with what I have. 
  What's the point?  The point is to clean out my system and rid myself of sugar and whatever other junk is in there that my body is hanging onto.  After detoxing from sugar, I will have a fresh system, feeling good and ready to reset my eating with more whole foods.  I don't plan on going vegan or sugar completely.  I do plan on being more cautious about what I put into my body, the temple God has entrusted to me.  "¹⁹ Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; ²⁰ you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies. " -1 Corinthians 6:19-20 
  Alright, that was a lot more than I was expecting to write, but I feel the necessity to explain a little of my past, to understand my present, and look forward to my future.  I usually weigh myself on Saturdays, so I will post that tomorrow. 
  Feel free to comment or send me a message. I will try to poste the juicing combos I have for 2 reasons.  #1 to share combinations.  #2, for me so I can duplicate what I like, and avoid combinations or portions I don't like.  Thanks for reading!  Pray for me if you feel led to do so. (I will certainly pray for anyone in need, just let me know.)  Denying our flesh is not easy, especially when we have been obeying it for so many years.   "Then Jesus said to His disciples, “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me." ~ Matthew 16:24


Blessings to any and all of you who read this.
Stephanie

Juice #1 on 4/26 (split and enjoyed with Julianne, and tried by Sarah & Cassie)
2 gala apples
2 handfuls of mini carrots
1/2 an english cucumber
Notes: too much carrot for my liking, a little to much apple as well.  Ice made it better.

Friday, April 27, 2012
Juice 1
1 apple
1-1/2 handfuls of carrots
1 mandarin
Notes: a little too much carrots still, mandarin helped

Juice 2
1/2 apple
1 handful of carrots
1/4 english cucumber
1/2 cup brocolli florets
Note: I was surprised, but couldn't taste the brocolli.  This juice was the best for balance and flavor so far.

Juice 3
1/2 apple
1-1/2 handful of carrots
1/4 english cucumber
1 cup of watermelon
Note: Too much carrot!  I will get it right...1 handful seems to be good for me.

He thinks I'm beautiful.

Yesterday in church, one of our pastors played a song called "According to You".  This song really struck a chord with me.  Here are the lyrics, read on and I'll comment after.

According To You lyrics

Songwriters: Diamond, Steve; Frampton, Andrew;

"According to you I'm stupid, I'm useless
I can't do anything right
According to you I'm difficult, hard to please
Forever changing my mind
I'm a mess in a dress, can't show up on time
Even if it would save my life
According to you, according to you

But according to him I'm beautiful, incredible
He can't get me out of his head
According to him I'm funny, irresistible
Everything he ever wanted

Everything is opposite, I don't feel like stopping it
So baby tell me what I got to lose
He's into me for everything I'm not
According to you

According to you I'm boring, I'm moody
And you can't take me any place
According to you I suck at telling jokes
Cause I always give it away

I'm the girl with the worst attention span
You're the boy who puts up with that
According to you, according to you

But according to him I'm beautiful, incredible
He can't get me out of his head
According to him I'm funny, irresistible
Everything he ever wanted

Everything is opposite, I don't feel like stopping it
So baby tell me what I got to lose
He's into me for everything I'm not
According to you

I need to feel appreciated
Like I'm not hated, oh no
Why can't you see me through his eyes?
It's too bad, you're making me dizzy

But according to me you're stupid, you're useless
You can't do anything right

But according to him I'm beautiful, incredible
He can't get me out of his head
According to him I'm funny, irresistible
Everything he ever wanted

Everything is opposite, I don't feel like stopping it
Baby tell me what I got to lose
He's into me for everything I'm not
According to you, you
According to you, you

According to you I'm stupid, I'm useless
I can't do anything right."

Alright, so when I heard this song, I couldn't help but hear the words of people in my life throwing lies at me. "You're lazy!" "You're a liar!" "You're unreliable!" "You're selfish!"  "You're insatiable!" "You're materialistic!"  "You can't handle it." "You're doing it wrong."  These, are the devil's lies.  I, am a child of Christ.  I speak the truth, I do a lot of things, seen and unseen for His glory.  I am reliable and I give my life for Jesus.  I don't think as a stay-at-home, home-schooling, mother of 3 children, ages 6, 4 and almost 1, has a lot of time to be selfish.  If anything, maybe I need to be a little more selfish and take more time out of my life, for me, to do the growing I want to do as a child of God.  I want to strengthen who I am in Him, not draw on the weakness of my flesh and not to have earthly people tell me what I'm not, but to live in the knowledge of who I am in Him, Jesus Christ.

I believe this song could be seen several ways.  One way is for a girl with a choice to make about who treats her well. Another ways is to see the "you" as the world, and the "he" as God.  The way I see it is that the "you" is the words of the devil, trying to come into my life and tear apart the fabric of Jesus in my life.  "He" is the one and only He.  "He" is the "I am."  "He" is Jesus.  To Him, I am beautiful.  To Him, I am incredible, worth dying for.  He can't get me out of His head.  When I do something silly, I think He laughs with me.  He cannot resist me, He pursues me.  He wants more of me.  He wants more time with me.  He wants to know me more!  The best part of it is that He already knows me, and loves me anyway, and died for me anyway, and wants more of me anyway!  I'm not perfect, and He knows it.  He's into me for everything you say I'm not. 

If you have to, read the lyrics again.  Don't listen to the lies of the enemy, but of the promises of the Lord. He has a plan for me.  He's calling me.  He's calling you too.  He is passionate about me.  Look my way, look my way....look my way..........look my way, my love.  He's drawing me closer.  He beckons me!  Lord thank you for your relentless love. 

He is my fact checker.  I don't have to believe anything not in His book.  He knows me.  He knows who I am.  He knows my heart.  He knows my intentions.  He is my God!

Blessings all, be intentional!

Intentional living

So today, I'm going to begin living more intentionally and not just going with the flow of the daily grind. There are 3 major parts to this: first part is eating intentionally, second part is going about the house intentionally (meaning: seeking what needs attention), third part is more quality time with my kids.

Food: I want to eat better. I want to eat intentionally. Along with food, comes exercise. I want to exercise intentionally, and most importantly, consistently. We usually do fairly well with veggies at dinnertime, but I know we could use more throughout the day, and less sugary stuff.

Around the house: I want to be proactive, ahead of the game, not waiting until the last minute, and have an orderly house.

Kids: I want to read more to my kids, I want to have more play time with them, more Word time with them, and when they ask for something, I want to make them a priority instead of reapeatedly say "Just a minute..."

So, today, I had steel cut oats with 1/2 a serving of craisins, 1/2 a serving of blueberries, 4 pecan halves, and flax seed for breakfast. I had a salad with 1 T. Light Raspberry Viniagrette, carrots, celery, chopped pecans, 1/2 serving of craisins, 2 slices of chicken and 2 slices of ham cut. Then a sandwich, 1 slice of bread, very little mayo, mustard, 1 romaine leaf, 1 slice chicken and 2 slices of ham. It was all good. I just had a blueberry yoplait.

I also have the second load of clothes in the wash for the day, and unloaded and loaded the dishwaster, cleaned the big fish tank, and will be doing the small tank momentarily. I'm going to read a book to the girls in just a bit. Cassie hasn't finished her school work yet, so after quiet time, she'll do that, then off to swimming. Hopefully we'll squeeze the book in there before we go.

I feel good about my food decisions today. I have been completely intentional about what I've wanted, rather than impulsively grabbing the closest sweet or crunchy thing. Today is a new day.

So my goal with being intentional, as far as food and exercise goes it to eat more natural, less processed foods, and I'd like to do at least a mile a day on the treadmill. Two would be nice though. Also, I'm setting a goal for myself... I am 46 days away from turning 30. I would like to lose 30 pounds by my 30th birthday! Yesterday, I weighed myself, and disappointedly, but not surprisingly gained a couple pounds back. I was 229.2. I'm through being in the 200's. By my 30th birthday, my weight will start with a 1. I repeat..."My weight will start with a 1!" As my age changes from starting with a 2, so will my weight. They'll just be headed in opposite directions.

I didn't want to put the challenge out there to lose 30, by 30, but if I don't, it leaves me open for failure, with no accountability. So it's out there. I don't plan on cutting out all of the treats, but limiting them substantially.

As spring is springing, we're moving into the house near my inlaws (on their property), and I know if the house isn't kept tidy, I will hear about it. This is the perfect starting point for me. It's overwhelming, but I know I am capable.

I'm on a journey to a renewed me. I'll be praying for wisdom, guidance, strength, restraint, and more.

Funny little children

I've posted 2 blogs previously about the funny things my kids have said. Here is a link to them. I've just updated the Idioms one. (Updates at the bottome of that blog.)

http://alaskablessings.blogspot.com/2008/11/precious-children.html
http://alaskablessings.blogspot.com/2008/09/idioms-of-motherhood-sounds-like-good.html

From now on, I'll post an update blog like this with links...or just make a new blog. lol. We'll see. I will be posting a couple other new blogs. Topics will include, our first picnic of the year, my husband the pilot, and our newest addition...(not the baby, yet...but a 4 legged kind).

Easter...what's it really about?

What is Easter about? God sent Jesus Christ, His son, to live among us, and when it came time, He died for us. Jesus knew He would die for mankind. Because He was crucified on the cross, He paid for all sins, not just some, but ALL. Does that mean we can all choose to do wrong and go to heaven? No...not like that. If we do wrong and are truly sorry for what we did, we can ask Jesus into our life, Jesus’ blood pays for our sins, God will forgive us.

Jesus says in John 14:6, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." Acts 15:11 says, "We believe it is through the grace of our Lord Jesus that we are saved, just as they are." Romans 5:1 &2 says, "Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God." Amen! I am thankful for my savior!


If you don’t know Jesus as your personal savior, or know of Him, but don’t KNOW Him, and love Him, I would like to pray for you. Please send me a message especially if you read the prayer below and have questions, OR sincerely say this prayer: "Lord, I believe that you sent Jesus, the Son of God, to die for my sins and has risen from the dead, please forgive me for what I’ve done. I want to live my life for you, not for me anymore. I do not deserve to go to heaven because I was born a sinner. Take me to heaven when I die. Thank you God for your grace and mercy. Guide me Holy Spirit, to make decisions according to your will for my life. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen." If you prayed that prayer, and believe in your heart, that Jesus is your savior, let me be the first to welcome you to the Kindom of God! In the the Book of John, chapter 14, verse 6, Jesus says, "I am the way, the Truth and the Life, no one comes to the Father exept through me." Send me a message if you’ve just excepted Jesus Christ as the Lord of your life, and your loving savior! I’d love to hear from you.

I encourage you, especially if you have never seen it, to watch "The Passion of The Christ". He died for you, the very least you could do is watch the movie and see what He endured so that you can go to heaven, if you choose to accept that gift. Church won't save us, being a good person won't save us, doing a lot of good things won't save us, giving a lot of money won't save us, even just reading the Bible a lot won't save us. We need a relationship with Jesus Christ, who forgives our sins, and we need to repent, to turn away from our sins and turn to Christ for true salvation.

For more information about Easter, please visit this site. http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vY2hyaXN0aWFuaXR5LmFib3V0LmNvbS9vZC9ob2xpZGF5dGlwcy9xdC93aGF0aXNlYXN0ZXIuaHRt"> Click here to find out more about Easter.


In memory of my Lord and Savior’s Crucifiction and Resurrection, God bless each of you,
Stephanie

It's Friday, but Sunday's comin'

Please watch this! As a Christian, this is a very special day in history. Thank you Jesus for dying for my sins! I have eternal salvation in heaven because you died for me.



If it doesn’t show up click here.

It’s Friday. Jesus is arrested in the garden where He was praying. But Sunday’s coming.
It’s Friday. The disciples are hiding and Peter’s denying that he knows the Lord. But Sunday’s coming.
It’s Friday. Jesus is standing before the high priest of Israel, silent as a lamb before the slaughter. But Sunday’s coming.
It’s Friday. Jesus is beaten, mocked, and spit upon. But Sunday’s coming.
It’s Friday. Those Roman soldiers are flogging our Lord with a leather scourge that has bits of bones and glass and metal, tearing at his flesh. But Sunday’s coming.
It’s Friday. The Son of man stands firm as they press the crown of thorns down into his brow. But Sunday’s coming.
It’s Friday. See Him walking to Calvary, the blood dripping from His body. See the cross crashing down on His back as He stumbles beneath the load. It’s Friday; but Sunday’s a coming.
It’s Friday. See those Roman soldiers driving the nails into the feet and hands of my Lord. Hear my Jesus cry, "Father, forgive them." It’s Friday; but Sunday’s coming.
It’s Friday. Jesus is hanging on the cross, bloody and dying. But Sunday’s coming.
It’s Friday. The sky grows dark, the earth begins to tremble, and He who knew no sin became sin for us. Holy God who will not abide with sin pours out His wrath on that perfect sacrificial lamb who cries out, "My God, My God. Why hast thou forsaken me?" What a horrible cry. But Sunday’s coming.
It’s Friday. And at the moment of Jesus’ death, the veil of the Temple that separates sinful man from Holy God was torn from the top to the bottom because Sunday’s coming.
It’s Friday. Jesus is hanging on the cross, heaven is weeping and hell is partying. But that’s because it’s Friday, and they don’t know it, but Sunday’s a coming.
And on that horrible day 2000 years ago, Jesus the Christ, the Lord of glory, the only begotten Son of God, the only perfect man died on the cross of Calvary. Satan thought that he had won the victory. Surely he had destroyed the Son of God. Finally he had disproved the prophecy God had uttered in the Garden and the one who was to crush his head had been destroyed. But that was Friday.
Now it’s Sunday. And just about dawn on that first day of the week, there was a great earthquake. But that wasn’t the only thing that was shaking because now it’s Sunday. And the angel of the Lord is coming down out of heaven and rolling the stone away from the door of the tomb. Yes, it’s Sunday, and the angel of the Lord is sitting on that stone and the guards posted at the tomb to keep the body from disappearing were shaking in their boots because it’s Sunday, and the lamb that was silent before the slaughter is now the resurrected lion from the tribe of Judah, for He is not here, the angel says. He is risen indeed.
It’s Sunday, and the crucified/resurrected Christ has defeated death, hell, sin and the grave. It’s Sunday. And now everything has changed. It’s the age of grace, God’s grace poured out on all who would look to that crucified lamb of Calvary. Grace freely given to all who would believe that Jesus Christ died on the cross of Calvary was buried and rose again. All because it’s Sunday.

Just to put it out there...

Alright...so here's an update on what's going on in the real estate world as far as I'm concerned with it.

The house that's on 5 acres, on the creek and near an airstrip, is still at $400k. What's interesting about that house is that the 2009 tax assessments came in. Keep in mind over a month ago, we informally offered them $325k and the man quickly turned us down. I'm wondering if he ever even mentioned it to his wife. Anyway, on the 2008 assessment, the 1920sf shop was not listed, meaning the value was not included in the $341,400 assessment for last year. This years has it on their valued at about $31k. Here's the kicker: the total assessed value for that home is now $324,500! Ha! How odd is that that it came out nearly a month after we offered them $500 more than that?!?

Alright, so then there's the house, I think I've written about...I will have to double check. I know I've told my sister about, but can't remember if I blogged it. Anyway, another house that is right down the road, viewable from my inlaws' property. That house is on 40 acres (only about 10 or so are actually usable...the rest goes into the lake). How can you sell land under a lake? But then you can't own water?? Anyway, last summer they were listing at $450k, then came down to $400k (at the same time the other house was $400k). In a heartbeat, I would prefer the one on the creek over this one. But then they told us they dropped their price. They really wanted to get rid of it. They lowered it to $395k! LOL! I thought it was a joke. So...a couple months ago I looked at it again online and found they lowered theirs again to $350k. I figured, that's a pretty decent price...though I'm holdin' out for the other one. About 2 weeks ago, I looked it up again to get the address so I could look at the property line and found out that they lowered it again!! It is now listed for $314,500! I was shocked. I looked up the assessed value and found out it's assessed at about $310k. Not bad, not bad. If we were to move into that house, I would totally want some major remodeling done. To include taking out a drive through area, that goes under a roof that is two stories high, I would make it more living space, I'd want a bigger master suite...I don't think it has a walk in closet. It has 4 bedrooms, but one is a micro room. The garage is large enough, I think we could encroach on some of it to make better us of the space on the first floor. So anyway...we'll see what the summer brings.

On our homefront, we just had our first evaluation for the Alaska Home Energy Rebate done. We should be getting our complete evaluation results next week some time. They did tell us that they will put in that our windows need replacing, which is awesome because for the last 2 or 3 years we've talked about putting in vinyl windows and just didn't get to it. So that's awesome. I'm not sure if they're going to put that we need a new front door or not, but that would be cool too. Two years ago we replaced our porch door with something much more air tight, so that is updated. They also said, since our downstairs ( the older part of the house is only 2x4 construction, they would request that we add 2" of insulation to bring it to code/standard, and would match the thickness of the upstairs walls. So...we're going to do the entire house, and have vinyl siding added...something else we've talked about for 2 years or so and just didn't get to. We have these things for sure that we'll be updating, which will not only increase the efficiency of our house, but update the look of it too with new windows and siding. I'm excited!

The really cool thing about this program is that they not only reimburse you for the materials expense, but they will also reimburse for the labor of a licensed & bonded company. How awesome is that? It would probably take us a long time to get all that stuff done, but hiring someone will go much, much quicker. Another bonus for the state reimbursing labor costs is that they allow you 18 months from the first evaluation to get the updates taken care of, to increase the point rating on the house. After that, they redo the evaluation and see how much you improved.

So that's that. I'm also excited that we're going to start work on our upstairs bathrooms soon. We are going to be combining 2 bathrooms into a master bathroom, and making Sarah's room only have 2 doors instead of a third into the 2nd bathroom upstairs.

Our home refinancing went through so we were able to pay off my larger sum, student loan since the house apr was .7 % lower than my loan rate was.

Anywho...blessings to you all, thank you for reading my posts. I have my first prenatal appointment on March 26th, so I'm sure I'll blog again after that. Oh! The sun is shining beautifully today...it almost has that springy feeling to it...it's awesome! It was still a little light around 8 last night, which is totally weird. I love it though. It's exciting to know that spring is coming. Praise God! He is so good!

In my daughter's eyes

As I was tucking Sarah in for the second or third time last night and had an overwhelming feeling when I looked into her eyes. I wanted to know who she would become as a woman, as a mother, in Christ, all the things she would accomplish and the lives she would touch. I kept looking into her eyes just trying to envision the beautiful person she is and will become. She nuzzled my arm as she often does, and just loved on me. And as I looked in her unknowing eyes, I began to wonder if we will ever make it that far. Will we ever see the days that far ahead? I believe we are living in the "last days" (not necessarily days, but perhaps years) before the return of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior.

When I first became a Christian, Christ's second coming seemed far off, but prophecies are being fulfilled as the days progress on. One of the most recent things I heard about was the Jews returning to Israel, as well as someone saying start the ovens again...in reference to another holocaust. The Bible says that Jews will return home before the Messiah returns. As indicated in Isaiah 43:5-6, they will return in such an order. News indicates that they have begun returning from the East, the West, the North, and now from the South.

Isaiah 43:5-6 "Do not be afraid, for I am with you; I will bring your children from the east and gather you from the west. I will say to the north, 'Give them up!' and to the south, 'Do not hold them back.' Bring my sons from afar and my daughters from the ends of the earth-"

Other prophecies include the One world government, the big 10, united currency, the microchip along with the mark of the beast. It's all quite alarming, even though the rapture of followers of Jesus Christ will be the end of all struggles and the beginning of eternity in heaven. Our carnal minds cannot wrap around leaving our lives, our spouse, our children, our family and friends as being a good thing, but it absolutely is for us, for those that will go to heaven. My heart breaks to imagine that some of my closest friends will not go with me. Maybe people believe, well, I'm a good person, so I'll go to heaven. That's not how it is though. Jesus says, ""I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." - John 14:6.

The Bible also says that many will be disillusioned. Matthew 24:24 says "For false Christs and false prophets will appear and perform great signs and miracles to deceive even the elect—if that were possible." I don't believe that 12.21.12 is the last day. It says in Matthew 24:36, "No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father." It goes on to say that just as in Noah's day, people will not know what will happen until the flood came and took them all away because they were caught up in so much sin and selfishness.

I urge you, if you don't know Jesus as your savior, please please please, ask me how you can, or at the very least, google it. If you think you will go to heaven, pray for God to show you the truth, that Jesus is the only way. Beware of false doctrine that claims they are Bible believing, even some evangelical churches are leading their followers in the wrong direction. As long as the Bible and God and Jesus are your sources, you can't go wrong. "If anyone teaches false doctrines and does not agree to the sound instruction of our Lord Jesus Christ and to godly teaching, he is conceited and understands nothing." -1 Timothy 6:3 & 4

So all of these thoughts are running through my mind, that one day, sooner than later, perhaps, we will be called up to be with our Lord. Time is short! I wept quickly wiping the tears from my cheeks as quickly as they came out so Sarah wouldn't think something was wrong. Tears were flowing as fast as I could wipe them. Was it just pregnancy emotion or compassion for the unsaved, or out of mourning for potentially a future I may not see. That's not a bad thing because we cannot even imagine how beautiful and wonderful heaven is and will be when we get there. It's so difficult to wrap our brain around that that is the better option than staying here on earth where things will literally go...in a handbasket.

Is it selfish to want more time? Jesus may come back in 2 years, 20 years, or 60 years, we have to be prepared for any of those timeframes. I would love to be able to see all of my children grow up into beautiful people inside and out, and love the Lord as I do. Only God knows if that will happen. I am thankful that I know my future whenever my flesh expires. I pray that you know yours and that it is the same place, heaven. If you're not sure, or you're sure it's not, please let me know. I am your friend, I love you as God loves me. The choice is yours, salvation is for everyone. Free forgiveness is for every one! We don't have to work for it, earn it, pay for it or fit a creed or be without sin to be good enough.

I don't know if I captured the emotion I was feeling last night, but it was overwhelming. I hope you see this is from my heart, it's not to condemn or judge you or anyone for that matter. Luke 6:37 "Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven." There is no condemnation in Christ. As a Christian, I am convicted by my sins, and that conviction urges me to repent, turn toward Christ and make better choices. (Romans 8:1 & 2 "Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death.") Praise God!

May God richly bless you and your family in abundance!
In Christ,
Stephanie

P.S. If you want to see more about Bible prophecy fulfilled and what's coming, you can go to www.jvim.com and view some of the videos. Pay attention to the scripture, not the presenter. By the way, this isn't what inspired this blog, it's been building for a while now.

The results are in!

So....here it is! We're expecting! It was neither planned nor prevented. My mom was here for a visit, and I suspected these results, so I tested on the 17th, the day before she was to leave. Nothing. You know how the instructions say not to reuse it...? Lol! Well, I only had one, and I wanted to see if it was just bogus and would still work. It appeared to work better if I left the cap off so it could dry out again...I know, gross! But those things are spendy! It still yielded no results...but I think it was because it was still very early.

Saturday, the 21st, I tested, and had a very light top and bottom of he vertical line as the picture below shows:

This is my actual result, the first time, above.

Mike wanted confirmation before we told more people, though I did tell my mom and my sister, because I know those lines don't appear unless it's a "prego" response. The instructions also said that if it's before, on or near the day of your supposed to be period, it could be lighter. It also took longer than I expected...nothing showed up after 3 minutes, so I looked about a half hour later, and that picture (above) is what I saw.

I decided I'd be patient and wait a week...so Saturday, February 28th, I retested. The results are the picture at the top of this page. The vertical line showed up as soon as the urine absorbed...it showed up just as fast as the horizontal line. So, no doubts about it, we're expecting!

I'm so excited! I am starting heavier this time than either time previous. I really need to be vigilant to not gain weight. With Cassie, I started at 180, ended at 230. With Sarah, I started at 200 and ended at 230. So it would be terrific if I ended at 230 again...since I am at 225. My wedding set does not come of...and when I work out, my hands get tight. If at some point my hands are cold, I will try to get it off so I'm not uncomfortable when my hands get hot, later in the pregnancy.

I'm thinking it will be a boy this time...of course it will be about 3 months before we'll find out. I have some names in mind already...I know Mike has had a boy name in mind for a while. He likes Sebastian. Sebastian means commands respect. I like 2 names for boys that I think are nice. During previous pregnancies, Mike mentioned that he would like part of his name in their somehow. With that in mind, I like Zachary (God remembers) Michael (who is like God) and Landon (from the long hill, or grassy plain) Michael. I'll have to go names of course, but for girls, I have a couple new favorites...K/Catherine, Moriah, and Bethany. I like Katherine because it's pretty, has nickname options, (Kat, Katy, Kathy, Rinny, Rina,), not sure if I like K or C better. It is Greek and means pure, innocent. I like Moriah because it's like Mariah, which I've liked, but didn't like the meaning "bitter". Moriah is Hebrew and means God teaches, seen by Yahweh; biblical name of the mount of the Jerusalem's Temple of Solomon. I guess Riah could be a nickname... I like Bethany as well...I didn't used to because the only definition I found of it was "House of Poverty". Maybe it was removed because it's not appealing, I don't know, but it is place of figs, and town name near Jerusalem.

Anyway...that's the latest. You know I'll keep updates on appointments and whatnots.

Our home refinance has gone through, now we're waiting for my loan payoff to go through from the refiance!

Blessings!

Ok, an update...

My last update was about the house that I really really like...5 acres on the creek and near a runway. I little more on that...a couple weeks ago I found out the owners were coming to town again and going to be listing their house for sale with an agent on a Tuesday at 11am. I was excited. My father-in-law told us they were "desperate" to sell the house this time. So I was thinking, "Sa-weet!"

I wanted to know what they were going to ask for it this time...(Reminder: it was $500k last winter, $440k last April, then $400k last summer, and it's been off the market since about September or so.) I called and spoke with the man and he said they were going to be listing it at $400k. Inner dialog: "Uh...wait...rewind...I thought they were desperate? Yeah, that's what Chet said they said...ok so maybe they're just starting high to give them some wiggle room." I asked if he would consider a lower offer before listing, since real estate fees would have been about $25k. He said he figured they would end up getting about $370k-$375k for the house... That to me meant if our offer was $370-$375k...then offer away, before they're listed.

So I told Mike and he agreed that that was a little bizaar for being desperate. Their 2009 tax amount and assessed amount are not in yet, so we couldn't see if it went up or not. Ours and others in our area lost about $6k in value. No biggie. Mike said, well, offer $325k and see what happens. I was stoked to even be in the position to make an offer. It was informal, because they weren't listed with the agent yet. The guy had given me the home phone number so I didn't have to call their cell long distance. I called the house at about 3pm on Monday or so and left a message saying I wanted to talk to them about the house. They didn't call back Monday night. So I figured, either they were busy, out with friends, or didn't want an offer since the next morning they were going to be listing.

Tuesday morning came...my mom and the girls and I were heading out the door when I realized my phone was dead! I was spazzing, thinking I missed their call...and this was about 8 minutes before 11 (the time of their apt. with the agent). I quickly plugged my phone in the van and turned it on, only to find I didn't miss any calls or have any voicemails. Bummer dude! So we went shopping and while we were out, I got a call from the man. He said they listed it for $400k. I said, that Mike and I would like to give you an offer to think about, and offer for $325k. He quickly and with a bit of a scoffing tone said, "No, I'm not interested in that amount. Have a good afternoon." I said you too.

That was no where near the outcome I was hoping for. Though we did accomplish letting them know where we stand when they really do get desperate. They have our phone numbers as well as our offer starting point.

I looked up on the Alaska Real Estate website and found something that just made me giggle...this same thing happened last summer. The real estate agent's page has the same error. It has pictures from the house next door (the other one they own, that was for sale at the same time last year.) Though the virtual tour is correct, the initial pictures you see are all wrong! One the real estate agents page, even the first picture is wrong...on the AK Real Estate page, it has the right front view, but all other photos are wrong. Good for us...bad for them. We'll see what happens.

We are signing papers tomorrow to refinance our house from 5.125% to 4.8% APR...this refinance is taking us back to 15 years again, but we're paying off my student loan...which still had a HUGE chunk left to pay, and it was at 5.55%. That alone will free up $385/month, and our payment will be about the same...maybe within $100 less that what we were paying. God is good...no...God is great! Praise God for providing for our family. We're getting a good hold of our finances, and desire to use cash to pay for everything...perhaps using the envelope system...at least on computer program I have called Money Map Software.

Have a blessed day, check back soon...I have another blog to post, just don't know when I'll get to it.

-Stephanie

A post I should have posted sooner...

I posted this on myspace on December 1, 2008

I have to start by saying, "Lord forgive me for not sharing our blessing sooner." I know first hand, that marriages have long been under attack by our enemy because he doesn't want families to prosper and grow in Christ. Well...this a testimony of what God has done for us.
Today is a significant day for 2 reasons. The first reason is because it is Mike & my 7th Anniversary. The other reason, is because it is the 1 year Anniversary to a miracle in our marriage.
Last year, Mike surprised me with a kidless trip to Fairbanks for our 6th Anniversary. I was excited to visit Fairbanks because I hadn't been there since I left in January of 2000. I was going to make the best of the trip, even though the place our marriage was at, at that time, was a mess. The last thing I wanted to do, really, was to be alone with him for 2 days. We had been quite distant for a long time, and we really didn't have the relationship that God intended us to have. I'm only being transparent here so you will see the blessing we received. There had been many growing hurts between us in the past years of our marriage. I, personally, was slowly losing faith that God would save our marriage. After years of prayers about various issues, I didn't have much left in me.
Well, Mike had found himself on the on the right path with Christ, and felt led to bring me to Fairbanks. He figured what did he have to lose? One sentence he said to me changed everything. It melted my heart. God had us where He wanted us. He turned our marriage around instantly.
I tried for years to make things change and no matter how hard I tried, it didn't work. What it took me a few years to realize, was that it was all in God's time. It was up to God to make changes, not me. Whenever we, as people start making changes, we usually end up in a mess. But when it's in God's time, the pieces fit together just right.
This last year has been a long road, but we are growing together in Christ and have developed our relationship more than it ever has been. Had Mike not taken me to Fairbanks, things may not have played out the way they did. This past year has been full of blessings.
I thank you Lord for my husband and for his new found obedience to you God. Thank you for the blessings you have given us, and thank you for the hope and inspiration we may bring to others by your goodness.
Mike, thank you for loving me. Thank you for being the provider for our family. I respect you for all you do for me and the girls. Happy 7th Anniversary hun! I love you.
By the way, the visit to Fairbanks was enjoyable. We went to breakfast with Dahlia and her family, went driving around for old times' sake, walked around NPHS, drove by my old house, went to Chena Hot Springs, and the Turtle Club (which I'd never been to). The only bummer was that we didn't get to go to Food Factory! We did go back to Fairbanks in June for my 10-year reunion, and again, didn't get to Food Factory. We went back for the fair, and finally went to Food Factory...lol...I miss their food.

That house again...

Ok, so it's been a while since I've blogged on here. I have a couple blogs from myspace I need to put on here too.

But what's been on my mind lately...that house! The second "house" is not for sale anymore...the one on Angel Dr. that wasn't completed downstairs. The house I'm talking about is the one that I posted a blog August 29th, 2008. I can't seem to get beyond this house. That house was taken off the market at the end of the summer or around fall time. The family that owns it lives in Colorado, and they took it off the market for the winter. So what does that mean...well a couple things. Since they have a home in Arizona and their other home in Colorado, they're still wanting to sell this one, but will probably list it again in the spring. And that leads me to my next point...there is no real estate agent involved right now. What does that mean? It means there is potential to offer them a lower price, since they won't be paying an agent. (If the house had sold at $400k as they were asking, that would have been $24,000 going to an agent or agents.) So that brings it down to $376k.

Another thing that gets me thinking more about this house is that interest rates are really low right now! 15 year is 4.967% and 30-year is 5.5%. Granted the interest that would accummulate over those times is amazingly a vast difference, but I'm positive we would refinance if rates were low in a couple years for a 15 year loan if we started with a 30 year loan.

If we were to sell our house for let's say $310k (we owe about $110k on it), we'd have roughly $200k...ok so let's say they're willing to come down to $375...-$200k is $175k. So $175k is what our loan would be for. I did loan estimates for $200k...and the best payment would obviously be from the 30-year loan, but the interest paid over 30 years amounts to just over the original loan amount...it would be $209k just in interest, assuming no extra payments were made. The 15-year loan turned out to only have $84k in total interest paid over the life of the loan. The only thing with the 15 year loan is that the amount plus insurance and taxes are too high for our current single income.

I am looking at job opportunities. But one plan I thought would work nicely is to have a little cabin at the end of the property for a rental income. I have been entertaining the thought of doing some part time work. One job was as a janitor, which isn't glamourous...but I do it at home (minus the maintenance type work because my husband is blessed by having many mechanical and technical abilities).

Oh! Something else came up in conversation at my inlaw's Bible study on Sunday. There is a man there that lives out there and does a van pool (share a ride) deal because he works in Anchorage. So I asked where he worked in Anchorage...he just so happens to work right down the road from Mike's work. So it would work out great for commuting.

I know that I would be able to keep that house clean and orderly. Everything would have a place to go. I'd have a craft room, the kids would have a play room, Mike would have a SUPER shop! (1920 sf!), plus the 2 car garage. We would have ample space for all of our clothes and the laundry room is on the same floor as 2 of the bedrooms. The library/small office would be a great place to have our books all organized, including Mike's mechanical and technical manuals that are in boxes in the garage. Mike would also be able to have an airplane if we did the 30 year loan. We'd be able to fish from our back yard, how awesome is that! I want to have a productive garden and store food for us to have through the winter.

This family have known my father in law for oh...probably 20-25 years. They're Christians and attend his church when they're visiting. They seem to be great people, and fair. When I asked before if they would sell it themselves rather than through the agent they were using, they said they wouldn't do that because they had done so much marketing for them etc. But now, there is no agent representing them, at that time, there was. Part of me wonders if that family is thinking about us as buyers, wondering if we're still interested. I think they will be here in February.

I know some people say that Christians shouldn't live extravagantly or in luxury but instead, use what they have to help others. But does that mean we can't enjoy what God has given us. No.

Another point of interest...last week Mike sent our mortgage company an email requesting a refinance quote. We haven't heard back from them yet. I got the automatic response from submitting an email to them, but that's it. Perhaps we aren't supposed to refinance...but sell and buy?

Lord, you know my heart, you know my desires for my family. You know that I do not want this house to say that I have a big house, but to live comfortably, provide a lot of our own produce for us and others and share our home with others when we can, while enjoying the blessings you have given us and to fill desires for our family, like Mike getting a plane, and being able to drive it from a publicly maintained airstrip, and allowing me the room to be organized to enjoy more activities, crafts and learning opportunities for the kids. I know that it is in your hands. Lord I want what is best for our family, not only to be financially taken care of, but to be in a great community to grow up in and at a safe distance from major traffic. I pray for hearts and doors to be opened. We have come so far this year Lord, and the glory is all for you. Thank you God for what you have done in my husband and in me this past year. Thank you for always providing for us and blessing us with abundance. In Jesus' name, Amen.

Precious children

Last night we sat down for dinner and I asked Cassie if she would bless our food. She, surprisingly to me, said, "No." Plain and simple, I asked again and got the same answer. Then Sarah said, "Doot doo Lord, Amen." I was thrilled. Doot doo is what her "thank you" sounds like. So sweet. So precious. That was her first time saying the blessing for our food. She's 2 years, 2 months and 5 days.

On another cute note, though we haven't reached the potty training mode quite yet with her, whenever I open her diaper she says, "Surprise!" Hilarious! Regardless of the contents...it puts a smile on my face.

Sarah shows signs of potty training, like a mostly dry diaper after nap times, telling me after she's pee'd or poo'd, and wants her diaper changed right then. She also likes to flush it down (sometimes while her sis is still on the potty).

Today Sarah asked me about a mole I have on my belly that she asked me about yesterday. Yesterday I told her it was mole, she said why? I said just because God put it on me. Today she said, "God...put...dat...mole...on you right there?" Sometimes her questions end with a sliding pitch that goes up and down at the end...that question was one of those times.

I need to do some videos of her in particular because she's so small, but talks so big, much like her sister. Every day they are learning so much, asking about new things. They are true gifts to me.

"The house"

Well, a couple days ago I decided to look at the state mls website to see what's available in smaller homes mainly to check the prices. If we were to get a house that were much less, then we could save more money every month. So...I looked, and saw a house that looked like it was in good shape on the outside. It was built in 2005 and said it was 3 bed, 2 bath, 2 car garage on .92 acres. The outside picture was all their was. Usually I don't even look twice at them, because if people really want to sell a house, they should post as many pictures depicting the house as possible. I would anyway. But something caught me about this house. It is a tri-level home, and the bottom level is unfinished. So I was curious what exactly "unfinished" means, as there are varying degrees to being finished. I emailed the real estate agent, and he sent me tons of pictures! I was excited to see what it looked like. So unfinished means, in this case, exterior walls have insulation and vapor barrier, interior walls have studs. There is a bathroom and laundry area plumbed but not finished. I wasn't quite sure what else was down there. I didn't know from the pictures if it had a bedroom and a den/family room, or just an open area. After viewing the photos, I was excited. Aside from the unfinished downstairs, what I was was...the kitchen. The kitchen to me, is probably the most important area of a home. I was blessed growing up with a pretty big kitchen, and when we moved into our house in Chugiak, the kitchen was pretty dysfunctional. Everything worked, but only one person could be in at a time and there wasn't much storage. If anyone knows me, they know storage is a good thing. ;-D So after seeing the photos of this kitchen...I was definitely interested in seeing more. The kitchen has a tile floor with a pattern in the middle to look like an area rug, maple 42" cabinets (nice choice...it's what we have too...). It looked pretty big, and from the pictures, I tried counting the cabinets, just to get an idea of what's there. Then there was the living and dining area. I was liking the maple flooring and white trim on everything. It was hard to see the size of the master suite from a photo because there's no furniture. I liked the look of the master bath (with jacuzzi and double vanity). So there was a lot that I liked about it, but in order to see if I had reason to be excited, I wanted to see it for myself. Then I debated, should I wait to see if Mike wants to see it or just go as soon as I can. (Mike is out of town.) I decided I should see it sooner than later, so I know if it's worth being excited over.

So why did I title this "The house"...because while I was looking at houses, including the one above, I found out that "the house" was no longer on the market. I did check the tax information on the borough's page and found that it's still in the same name, so I think they just took it off the market again and will probably put it on in the spring.

So anyway, I set up an appointment to view the house. It is located about 2 miles or so, closer to Wasilla than the daycare that I worked at. The girls and I headed out. I didn't know what to expect for the road there...it wasn't too bad. The directions said 6th house on the right...well, I counted 2 or 3 houses (not counting just driveways that looked like they went to open logs) and came upon a house that looked about right...and saw the house number and that was the one. Well...it was down off the road a little bit...a little hill. I thought, holy cow...this isn't good. It looked like on an icy day you'd have to have your garage door opened already just in case you couldn't stop. So that part wasn't a great thing. But I was still eager to see what was inside. I was excited to find out before we left that it had radiant/in-floor heating, and it was a foreclosure. Apparently it'd been on the market nearly a year now, and had been recently listed for $60,000 more than it is listed for now. So the bank is really wanting to get rid of this house.

The inside of the house was as I imagined it from the pictures, though I was even more impressed with the kitchen (minus the counter tops). The counters were laminate with a not so appealing edge or wood trim, and the backer against the wall was like a 1x3 of plain wood. That's ok though it would be fine to replace. The appliances were taken with the owners (though they were originally listed with the house), so we'd get to pick out what we want.

It has a good size breakfast bar, where I think 3 or 4 stools could sit comfortably. It does have natural gas, so it would use a gas oven/range. The living/dining area is transposable, you could have either room on either side of the area, as there is no defined area for either. The upstairs, in the listing, said it had 2 finished rooms and 2 bathrooms upstairs.

The picture above is from the dining/living area. The far left is one of the cabinets in the kitchen, then to the right of that is the front entry, mirrored closet and small storage closet, the obvious stairs, and to the right, out of the picture is a door to the back.

So I went up the stairs and was not impressed with the size of the first room. It was quite small, though I figured it would be good for Sarah, since I knew the other room up there was the master bedroom. Then I discovered there is a room attached to the master suite like a baby room, and has not other door to the hallway. Kind of strange, but fine nonetheless. A second or independent door could be made, or after the construction downstairs is finished, the dividing wall could be knocked down to increase the size of the master bedroom. So there are actually 3 rooms upstairs finished right now. So we could have both girls in 1 room, so Alexa has a room, or Cassie in Alexa's room since Alexa doesn't stay with us very often. And when Alexa is there, Cassie could either stay with her or stay in Sarah's room.

Now for the downstairs. It does have an unfinished bathroom (meaning it has the pipes and that's it), the laundry area, I think intended to be in a closet, an open area like a den or family room, and another area I think is a room. So...there is another room down their, and the family room, that could, if needed have a wall built and made into another room. So with the upstairs as it is with 3 rooms, the house would be a 4 bedroom house, or easily a 5 bedroom...again if needed down the road. I'd rather have the family room for now, so the kids have a play area.

The garage looks quite similar in size to what we have, it has a workbench and storage closet as well. The lot...other than the interesting driveway (which I think we'd have to have my father-in-law see if there's another way somehow to construct it), most of the property is behind the house. To the right of the house is a little bit of land...maybe 20 or so feet...I didn't really measure, just guessing from memory. I'm not sure how much is on the left side. But the area behind the house is quite vast. All that's there is a slightly unlevel, weedy area. It has potential. When I mentioned the backyard and driveway, Mike seemed a little concern that this house might be where all the water would collect during spring. I didn't pay attention to the neighboring properties to know whether or not they were lower or higher.

What I had originally thought, is that if we sold this house and took on a smaller loan, paying what equity we'd earned in this house toward the other one, we'd have a very small mortgage to pay, and be able to save more money every month. After I ran it by Mike, he thought it would be a good idea to keep the house we're in now, and rent it out. It is in a pretty desirable area, since it's near Anchorage for Valley commuters who want to move closer, but has land and a good neighborhood. So I was curious to see if people would be interested if renting a house of this size. I'm not very familiar with the renting market, so I posted an ad on craigslist. The ad listed all the features and the approximate cost we'd charge if there were no utilities, some utilities or all utilities included. I posted the ad at noon, and by 8pm, I had 8 emails from people who all expressed a sincere interest in renting our house if we did move and rent it out. So that was reassuring to me, that there seems to be a market for this size house in our location. So the next morning, I had another email expressing interest, but as that woman was on assistance, she wanted the price to be lower, plus electricity...that would be a total of about $200 lower than others are willing to pay. So 9 responses...and as I am writing this blog, another email has come in expressing interest.

The way I would see everything transpiring was for us to move out there and work on the downstairs as time allows, and rent this house out as soon as possible, to allow for the income to start so we wouldn't be paying 2 mortgages without help from renters. Mike had a different idea...not wrong, just different. He said we'd have to finish the downstairs there first then move. I thought it would work fine if we just put a baby gate across it and taped up a plastic sheet. He reminded me of how life was when we re-did our kitchen. We pretty much cooked at ate upstairs using a microwave. I think that situation is a little different mainly because that was a main living quarters and we did have a kitchenette area up there. In the house, if we moved while we did the finishing, there are 3 rooms upstairs that are finished, as well as the living/dining area and the kitchen and 2 bathrooms are finished. That to me is worthy of living in while construction is confined to the downstairs. The only stumble is the laundry area. It's not finished yet, but...we would have a couple choices, either finish it first, go to a laundromat, or drive about 9 or 10 miles to Vickii's and use their machines. I don't think it would be a big inconvenience to live there while we worked on it. Especially if we had to make both payments at the same time...where if we moved in, we'd have our current mortgage's monthly payment paid for by renters.

Here are some interesting points of interest, other than "the house" now being off the market. God took that one out of the equation. There's a little bit more that I'll say is interesting...the house is on Angel Drive...totally love that! The road before Angel is Potter Place...that's great too! And another bit of interesting information, the real estate agents name is Israel. ;-) LOL...and he's a missionary for the prison ministry, I believe for Palmer, but headed today actually, to start the ministry in Kenai too. (And a side note, last weekend one of our pastors was to speak and he was sick and they received a call from 2 missionaries in the Eagle River Prison Ministry...) So...these things could be viewed as signs...persay, but until further evaluation, they are all definitely interesting!

I am thankful for what I have. I want to get rid of something, and I know that if we moved, I would have the opportunity to be very thorough about this. We'll see what happens. We'll see where God is leading us. Thank you Lord for all of your blessings on our family.