Not for me...right now anyway...

Alright, some of you already know how my preschool teacher job is going. Let's just say, it isn't. :) I started on October 1st, which was a Wednesday. I worked through Friday, then Monday through Thursday the two following weeks. There was one glitch...Sarah was only able to go there like 3 of those days. Vickii (my mother-in-law) had to watch her all the other days. Seems pretty silly that I, while working in a daycare, would have to find someone to watch one of my daughters. Why? Because the daycare had not yet been licensed to have over 12 kids (a max of 5 under 30 months), so unless one was sick or sent home, Sarah couldn't be there.

Initially I thought it would be fine because the owner told me she was supposed to hear back from the state on the 1st of October...which came...and went. So after my first 3 days, the next Monday, I told my boss I would only be able to work if Sarah could come in because Vickii was busy. It turned out that a little girl got sent home for biting, so I worked from 11-2:30 that day. Then the next week, I wasn't sure if she'd be able to watch Sarah, and I wasn't thrilled about asking either. I didn't want to burden Vickii with watching Sarah every day for an uncertain amount of time. It just wasn't right. Vickii agreed to watch Sarah for the week of the 13th. But I could not just let it go unnoticed that this was an inconvenience and couldn't continue much longer. I knew I was already on the schedule for the rest of October, but I knew Vickii couldn't watch Sarah this week (of Oct 20), and I don't have a regular babysitter, and wasn't about to find one. So I wrote a conditional letter to my boss. It basically said that I would finish the week of the 13th and 5 more days when Sarah was allowed to come in, and then that would be my last day. That way, if she didn't get state approval for more kids, that would be at least 2 weeks notice. If she did get her approval, I wanted to be able to make the decision before she made November's schedule whether or not I would continue working there. I left that letter on her desk on Monday the 13th, and on Tuesday morning when I came in, there was a letter in my file indicating that they would not be able to accommodate the 5 days or working with Sarah able to come in, and that my last day was October 17th. I wasn't scheduled for the 17th...but through the 16th. So last Thursday was my last day. It was bittersweet and I got choked up as I told the little girl that before I met her didn't know how to read any letters, and after just 2.5 weeks, she could write all of the letters of her name (granted not understanding that we write left to right). She didn't seem to realize that when I said it was my last day, I wouldn't be back.

I silently prayed for each of those kids in my last days there, as well as the workers. I pray for the best for them, whatever their home conditions are. I pray that if they don't know who Jesus is, that they will learn and accept Him as the Lord of their life, and savior of their souls, and grow to love Him as He loves us.

So do I regret working there? Absolutely not. Do I think I heard God wrong, that that door wasn't for me to go through? Absolutely not. I truly believe that God will let us do what we want to do. I believe that through our experiences we learn from them what we choose. From that experience, I learned that being a preschool teacher is not for me, at least in those circumstances. When talking to Mike about the situation, he said something about whether I still thought it was God. I said yes, because He uses our circumstances to teach us a lesson, especially when we thing we want something. His response was, "In two weeks?" I said yes. It doesn't take long to learn. At least for me in that situation, things began to pile up on the side for me not supposed to be there.

So for the time being, I will concentrate on getting our home in order, and on the sideline, see what else is available in the job world. I may decide to watch a kid or two...or infant on a part-time basis. I know how difficult it can be to have part-time infant care, so that may be something for me to look into. That way I'm not overwhelmed with 5 other kids, and under pressure to teach them, when two want to do whatever they want. It was a great experience to teach the little ones that were ready to learn. It was amazing to see them learn something that I taught them. I did have fun with them (even when they were grumpy and I had to put them in timeout).

Though that job was in a great location, to position us for "that house"...I believe it wasn't right. It's not meant to be, at least for the time being. I still believe God is moving in my life, and I'm eager to see where that is. I joined up with Love INC. (Love In the Name of Christ) of Eagle River. I went to my first function on Friday. I look forward to helping those who need it around the community. I am also pretty sure I'm going to be taking over the nursery at church. I will be in charge of making the schedule and overseeing the supplies, cleanliness and security of the nursery for services.

I am thankful for the opportunity I was granted. For the record, I think I would be ok doing before and after school care. I just can't handle so many kids all day. I can handle a few all day, in addition to mine...just not so many. It's hard to get 5 to 7 kids, all interested in going different directions, all in the same direction.

I am very thankful for my kids, and I appreciate them so much. Thank you Lord for the blessings you've given me.